Passion

In the book "Fun Home", the author, Alison Bechdel writes her biography through a comic strip. I've never read a book quite like this. It is indeed a novel that has just as much content to read as any other but it is so helpful that there are pictures on every page! (I wish every book were like this). I started to read this book on the plane to South Carolina and surprisingly couldn't put it down. I was giggling next to a complete stranger at the mere irony of the book. At first, it seemed to be a comedy about a family from the sixties, but as I read further I realized that it was a tragedy wrapped into a comedy. Bechdel describes her childhood in a very frustrating way, yet adds small dialogues to make the reader understand that although she didn't feel that her childhood was the best, she realizes the reader can relate to her own family. It's the only family she's got so she embraced even the bad parts. She especially emphasizes on her father...

The first chapter of the book was most interesting to me because it was the perspective of a daughter about her father, so I could relate in a way. Alison’s father was always around, but he was always concerned about other things besides the children. He put the kids to work in the house all the time and everything had to be in order and "just right" or he wouldn't be happy. Although his job didn't revolve around houses, he had somewhat of an obsession with rebuilding the house they lived in that was made in the 1800's. Her dad was determined to refurnish the house to it's best and even better than it was built. "In this regard, it was like being raised not by Jimmy but by Martha Stewart." The kids never really got time to spend with their father unless it was labor around the house.

Although Bechdel describes her life in the first chapter as hard work and un loved, she also realized when her father was caring. "Sometimes, when things were going well, I think my father actually enjoyed having a family." But then she second-guesses her statement with a comic relief, "Or at least, the air of authenticity we lent to his exhibit. A sort of still life with children." (As the kids sat by the Christmas tree they had been working to put up for him). "He could conjure an entire, finished period interior from a paint chip"(Alison holding up a ruler for her father to see if something is level) "my arms falling off" This is just another example of the many humorous remarks Bechdel uses to cover up her sadness about her childhood. We all do this to not only relate to others but to mask what we truly feel.

Page turner

 By the end of the novel, do you get used to Alvarez’s style? Why did she choose
this style? Does it work? Is she able to get you to finish reading the book even
though you know the ending? What does she focus on instead and why?

At first this book was very hard to understand because I felt as though it was a bit scattered with it's ideas, thoughts and especially characters. Her writing was easy to understand after the first few pages of Dede's "third person" monologue because it started to unravel the meaning behind the story.... her sisters' death. After reading Dede's chapter, reading the other girls voices became a little harder because it was a new narrator and new writing. I love how Julia Alvarez can be so versatile in her writing by taking each of the characters voice. Alvarez's style worked out perfectly after I read through the first four chapters. It was much easier to determine the four sisters from each other.

I'd like to believe that Alvarez used this style to help the reader get a better sense of each girl and the actual events that took place and how each girl reacted and perceived them. For example, there is a huge difference between perceptions of life according to their experiences; the youngest sister, Maria Theresa and the oldest, Patria are prime examples of this. After Patrias husband Jamito left her because she had met with the revolutionary priest, she was devastated. "That first day was the hardest. I was crazy with grief, all right. When Dede and Tono walked me into the house, all I wanted to do was lie down and die...I got up from my bed ready to set up housekeeping at Mama's" Here, Patria is distressed and knows the hardships of life, but still takes on the "daily grind" When Maria Theresa describes the hard ships of being locked away, she describes her devastation in a different way, a less mature way describing how she's uncomfortable. "After you lose your fear, the hardest thing here is the lack of beauty. There's no music to listen to, no good smells, ever, nothing pretty to look at." She's more concerned about material things and believes if she doesn't feel comfortable, the "world will end" where Patria has had something horrible happen to her and still moves on with life. With this difference of character, you can imagine how many “sides” of the story there are.

Although I knew the ending to this story, Alvarez keeps you hooked with the different characters. I was never bored reading this book because for every chapter, there was a different voice, it's as if I knew the sisters as well as if they were my own. Every sister told a different version of the suspense and as I read on, the story replayed in a different perspective, which is what helped this book to be so successful.

Dede's Time Line

-Born in 1925
-Private school around the age of 13 with her sisters
-Met Lio when Minerva and Dede play volleyball one day (age 16 or 17)
-Lio left when he went into exile
-Engaged and married Jamito
-Goes to ball with father, sisters and husbands
-Father was arrested for protecting Minerva-
-Father dies 1953
-Has child (three total)
-Bankrupcy
-Sisters approach Dede's cause (Dede goes to revolutionary priest, husband finds out and leaves with children because he didn't want to get involved with the revolutionary causes.
-Arrests are made by the government-go to jail
-Jamito and Dede try to bail the arrested people out of jail- Dede then notices that she will always be involved with the revolutionary causes because her SISTERS are involved....a.k.a. (she is part of them)
-3 sisters die on November 25th, 1960
-Dede sets up a memorial house and open interviews in commemoration of her sisters- after their death-1994 Interview (1st chapter)

The good ol' days

Out of all the girls in the book "In the time of the Butterflies", I felt as though it was easier to read Maria Theresa's entries/ chapters. There were a few reasons for this, one being that she made everything sound so simple and positive, like no one could do any wrong. Another being that she writes very similar to the way I do or would have at her various ages. Not only can I relate to her, but because I'm the oldest child in my family, I can sort of understand now what the youngest child might go through because it's put in such simple terms.

In her first chapter, chapter 3, she writes to her "dearest little book" that Minerva gives her. The mere fact that she addresses her diary in such a sweet caring manner shows that she has such a positive outlook on life. She never once seems to have a bad day. She also shows this sweet caring manner when she lists her new year’s resolutions of 1946. Just to give you an idea here are some of her "horrible" antics she must change... "I resolve to be diligent with my tasks and not fall asleep when I say my prayers, I resolve not to think of clothes when I am in church, I resolve not to be so tenderhearted as even Minerva says crying will bring on prematuring wrinkles" These resolves alone make Maria Theresa seem like an angel. Being so young, she's probably never been exposed to the "real" sins in life. This is what makes her so delicate and lovable and so easy to follow.

Also, because Maria Theresa is so young, she has a way of explaining things to the reader that are put so simply that you just have to laugh and think... 'I couldn't have put it better myself' For instance, when she explains walking for her first communion she states, "I think saints all lived before high heels were invented" She captures the moment and says what only an 8 year old could think of. It's endearing and so very true.
Maria Theresa doesn't yet realize that Minerva is very controlling with her. I remember being in Minerva’s shoes and telling my sister anything because she was so gullible. I now feel awful for being such a controlling older sister, but it’s very interesting seeing it from the other perspective. Instead of her taking it the wrong way, she sees Minerva’s bossiness as helpfulness/guidance. You can tell that she looks up to her older sister because she literally mentions her in EVERY diary.

I think that I love to read Maria Theresa's writing the most because I too want to feel my inner child come out. That sense of innocence and naivety feels almost refreshing. Although later in the book she grows up to find out that the world isn't made of rainbows and unicorns, it's nice as the reader to revert back to childlike thinking in the beginning of the book.

Daddys little girls

Throughout the first 4 chapters with each sister reiterating her version of life, it becomes evident that although they're different in many aspects, they all think very highly of themselves. Each sister mentions in some way or another that she is the parent’s favorite. They all have a sort of arrogance about themselves, not to say they are conceited and selfish, but it seems as though they were raised to think highly of themselves to build confidence. It's obvious that their family's support plays a huge role in their thoughts about themselves. It goes to show you how close these girls were with their sisters and parents.

Dede speaks in 3rd person in the first chapter about her sisters and how she is "The sister who survived". Because she has this stress on telling the story, it seems as though she views herself a little differently from the rest of the sisters. When she talks about the past, it's almost as if she thought she missed some hidden meaning that could have saved the rest of them. For instance, "As Dede is helping her father step safely up on the stairs of the galeria she realizes that hers is the only future he really told....A chill goes through her, for she feels it in her bones, the future is now beginning." She looks back to a time where she believes she could have helped them. She also shows her "arrogance" by stating that her father had really only mentioned her. However, I believe that because she went through this traumatic event (losing her sisters); she is more thankful for life and less arrogant about it.

Minerva speaks in 1st person in the second chapter about her ambitions and her experience at sleep away school. She is very intelligent and high-minded. Because of this, she seems like the most arrogant, (a "know it all"). Especially to her younger sister Maria Theresa. She talks about herself as though she was the only one her parents could trust or have understood them. "More than once he said that Patria as a nun would be a waste of a pretty girl. He only said that once in front of Mama, but he repeated it often enough to me." She first explains that her father disapproves of her sister, Patria and then concludes that he went to her to express his feelings, showing that she was more valuable to their father. Minerva speaks as though she knows everything and is a very hard headed girl, some might see it as independent and strong, others would view it as self-centered and conceited.

Maria Theresa speaks in 1st person in the third chapter about her "little book" she received for her communion. Most of the chapter is about her communion and how she views the world in a positive manner. You can also tell that from her entries that Minerva has a great influence on her, so much so that she is in a way, her mini-mi. "Dear Little Book, I don't know if you realize how advanced I am for my age? Don't tell anyone: I don't like it here that much. But after we talked Mama into letting me board, I have to pretend. At least, Minerva is here with my even if she sleeps in another hall." This shows that she has a very positive outlook on herself but is still very reliant upon her older sister for reconfirmation.

As for Patricia, being the oldest of the four, she is very religious and knew from the very start why she was put on this earth. She married young and had children. She was always thinking of others first, however just like her other sisters, she too had an arrogant side. “From the beginning, I was so good; Mama said she'd forget I was there. I slept through the night, entertaining myself if I woke up and no one was around...One morning she found me changing Dedes wet diaper, but what was funny was that I hadn't wanted to disturb Mama for a clean one, so I had taken off mine to put on my baby sister." Even when she was still in diapers, she was taking care of others!

It's obvious that all four sisters are strong-minded in a sense; however they all have their own way of portraying that characteristic and it becomes very obvious that they are indeed products of their environment.

Same country...two different worlds

Throughout the monologue "Sophie et Apolline" there is a significant difference in the morals and opinions of these two French girls. They both seem as though they are having a conversation with one another, yet they are both at very different stages of their lives. They both start off talking about smoking; its consequences, what role it plays in their life and how they view it as a whole. Smoking is merely a metaphor for the rest of the topics discussed in the monologue. Sophie, in my portrayal of the monologue is the younger girl. She is more open to new things because she hasn't yet been jaded from the real world and seems as though she has a much better relationship with those around her who encourage her. Apolline on the other hand seems as though she is much more "worn" from the world around her. She sees more clearly what’s wrong and right from her past experiences. You can also tell that the people around her are more silenced, bringing her to find all her conclusions about society.

Sophie, the more 'enthusiastic about life' character, portrays a young girl that hasn't yet suffered the big consequences in life on account of various factors in her life such as family and experiences. She mentions the first time she had sex. "It was very good. He cared about me. He said he wasn't a virgin but I think he was. He was shy and didn't know what he was doing. He was kind with me." She explains her first experience with sex as if it was nothing to her and probably more to the boy she was having sex with. She doesn't seem at all guilty or disgusted with herself. On the other hand, Apollines story was a little different. "It was very bad. The boy wasn't my boyfriend. Just a friend. I didn't want to have sex. I was a little drunk. I regret that he wasn't the boy I liked." Apolline feels much more remorse for her first time and feels a little jaded from the experience, however has learned from it, "I am with my boyfriend now. He is gentile. He pays attention to me. We have sex one or two times a week."

Not only do these girls differ in sexual experiences, the environment around them also effects how they view the world. Sophie is very open with her father which boosts her confidence with boys and makes it easier for her to make moral decisions. "I talk to my father about sex. He asks me questions. He asks if it good for me and what we did. Sometimes I don't answer. He says I have to be careful. Don't get pregnant and diseases." Apolline has a very different relationship with her parents. "I wish my parents knew I had a boyfriend. They wouldn't approve so I don't tell them." with this relationship, it's "swept under the rug in a sense. She doesn't get that confirmation from her parents that it is okay to be intimate with others. Which is why I think a big reason she regrets her first time is because it was so discouraged in her family.

I found myself reading this monologue about three times over. I knew the minute I started reading it, it's what I wanted to blog about. However, I couldn't figure out what aspect of the monologue I wanted to blog about. There were so many different metaphors and issues I could relate to. Gladly, the last time I read the monologue I started to pick up on how different these two girls were although the best of friends. It was very interesting to see the distinct differences between the two and actually being able to relate to both was in a way...rewarding because it shows that I too have their aspirations, their fears and most importantly a best-friendship that also cannot be described.

Our inner monologue

            Although people are afraid to admit, we all talk to ourselves...each and every one of us. We encourage ourselves to "do better next time" or tell ourselves "you're almost there" and then there are times when we doubt ourselves look around to see if no one is looking and repeat over and over again "DUMB DUMB DUMB" Then there are those inner monologues that maybe question your sanity like having a serious conversation with yourself in the car or in the shower...some where you know that is safe. All inner monologues have no intention of leaking out to any outsiders, because then...you'd just be weird....

I find that Ensler wonderfully portrays a young teenage girls monologue in "let me in". Ensler writes in a way every reader can relate to... even if they're not a teenage girl living in suburbs, USA. One technique I caught onto was her repetitive phrases such as "Don't worry. I don't say this out loud. God no. Only in my head. These are my friends...supposedly." I believe Ensler was trying to send a message that the girl was so insecure with herself that she even had to justify her thoughts to the reader. This monologue tells every teenagers story. It's about a girl that wants to be popular and to fit in and in order to maintain her position on the hierarchy of what she calls "the posse" and she must have a constant inner monologue so people believe she is perfect and that she has everything under control.

The very reason people work things out in their head is to appear like they have everything together, when in actuality, they don't. It becomes most evident that the girl in this monologue was having too many of these conversations with herself to keep track of reality and her own thoughts. "Oh God. Everyone was looking. I must be really screaming. It's in the cafeteria and not just in my head." She tries so hard to be liked that her brain cannot handle this overload which results to her collapsing onto the floor. Wendy Apple is an important character in this monologue because she not only helps this girl but helps the reader to understand that everyone has their own voice inside telling them what and what not to do and sometimes you must listen to the one that is screaming "help, this is not right".